Happy New Same old same old

The start of the new year has been sketchy for me this year – and i think is most years. So much emphasis is placed on a new beginining and the idea that the clock resets at midnight on the 1st January each year that the possibility of it not living up to its promise is almost a foregone conclusion.

Hopefully we spend time before the dawn of the new year thinking through what we accomplished the past year, where we fell short and what we want for the year ahead but the insistence on a whole new feeling on the 1st is a receipe for despondance. well it is for me anyway. Often I begin the year feeling tired. I’ve worked till the last second before Christmas then been slammed with Christmas arrangements and family duties and obligations without having the time to get into the spirit of Christmas because there has not been sufficient time to prepare my mind for it. We race through Christmas only to be faced with New year and the expectation that it will be a huge party or super special in some way. I’ve taken to avoiding New Years altogether since my daughter was born, since the advent of feeling under the weather with a young child is more torturous than most anything else i can imagine – well except someone pulling out my toenails one by one – that would be worse, oh and waterboarding. Okay there are a lot of things worse but you get my meaning?

It’s days later now and the new year has kicked in, in earnest and I am happy to say that the slightly desperate feeling has gone. I’ve rediscovered my “why” and I feel a new sense of purpose for the new year. I guess the point is that perhaps you have to get through those not 100% upliftling feelings as preparation for a new beginning.

I hope that if the new year has started off a little rickety for you, you now find yourself on more solid ground, strong and ready to manifest your dreams!!


Happy 2018 Y’all!!!


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7 Steps to living the Life of Your Dreams

Last weekend I stood beside my very close friend and together we said goodbye to her mama. She was no ordinary woman – She was a lady and a Sexy Mama.

Sitting at the memorial listening to her family talk about her I remembered some of the extrardinary things that she had demonstrated in her life and how important those lessons are for anyone wanting to live a good life.

Abundance mentality – In this home there was always more than enough to go around. Enough food, love, warmth, attention. If you arrived unexpectedly a plan would always be made without you feeling unwelcome. Frugality was checked at the door. She lived from a belief that life is abundant, that the universe provides and it worked for her!

Strong family bond – this sexymama was such a matriarch that her family all lived within walking distance of her. The family bond is so important in times of hardship, heartache, happiness, celebration,when you have been thrown a curve ball in life and when life couldnt be better. If you have family you have everything you need. So many times when i went there you’d find 4 generations all lying together on mama’s bed watching TV or chatting and laughing together. This sexy mama was a lioness when it came to protecting her family. She knew the importance of family and she embraced it.

 Moral Compass – This sexy mama didn’t take any crap. She was loving, and warm, but she was also pretty friken scary if you crossed her.  Her moral compass was set to true north and there was no bullshit. Her boundaries we firmly in place. She knew what her standards were, what she believed and what she would accept – if it fell outside of that it had no place in her home.

Passion  – SM was all about passion. Passion for her garden, her cooking, her beloved Italian opera, her kids, her grandkids, her extremely successful business. everything she did she poured her passion into.

Hard Work – SM worked hard. There was no 2 ways about it. She ran a very successful guesthouse, an office of a leading estate agency and was the top seller within her province for many years running – but it never looked like a hardship or a slog or someting she resented, she ran them all with grace, with passion and with immense joy which leads us to the very important next point…

Gratitude – SM worked, played, loved, laughed, cried, mourned, celebrated all with immense gratitude. She had an inate understanding that Gratitude is the combination lock that opens the door to your best life.

and last but not least

A Big Heart – helping the less fortunate – For this Sexymama helping the less fortunate was really important and so she was involved in soup kitchens, helped out people within her community that needed a helping hand and was a real champion for the underdog. Some of the loudest sobs at the service were from the ladies that had faithfully worked for SM most of their adult lives.Screen Shot 2017-07-17 at 3.28.01 PM

And thats all it takes to live the life of your dreams. As soon as one of these steps or principles is ignored or sidelined your life will start going to the dogs. You dont have to be wealthy to apply these principles, you dont even need to have family in the traditional sense – you can create a family by creating strong bonds in your tribe. When you break it down its not that hard – it just needs to be practised everyday.

So thats what I learned from this Sexy Mama. I can only hope when it comes time for people to speak about me that they can honestly say some of these things too.